A very sad event was when my oldest brother passed away five years ago. What made it even sadder was the fact that I was not allowed to attend his funeral because I'm forever shunned, which is the title of my book. The night of the viewing when my two nephews and I arrived at the farm. We wanted to make sure it would be ok if we came to the funeral the next day. We asked his sons and they clearly told us we would not be welcome at the funeral.
This reinforces in my mind how hurtful and silly the typical Amish viewpoint is about such things. I understand that they realize how unkind that is but I also understand that they strongly believe it's the right thing to do. That should give an indication of how much they need to change their thinking on such matters. I am happy that at least I was allowed to attend the viewing and to visit with family that evening and pay my respects to my brother.